I'm becoming complacent

and it's scaring me. A lot.

When I woke up this morning, I realized - every day this week has been the same. I've talked to the same people, done the same amount of work, worn the same things. I've stopped striving for something new, and no longer have I been talking to new people and making friends.

When did I become this complacent, this ordinary, this mundane? I need to get back to the way I was even a few weeks ago. Excited for a new year, wanting to make change happen. I had goals, a plan for a way to make them happen, changes in store.

I'm going back to that. I'm going to get out of my comfort zone, even with little goals. I'm going to go to lunch with someone that I wouldn't normally, and reach out to another after school hours.

Because if we're really all hiding our true feelings, it makes sense that someone out there is feeling the same way I am, I would never know otherwise.

And I don't want to waste this life.